Tuesday, 13 October 2015

100 word ch (as the flashing light came toward me...)

 

      As the flashing lights came toward me it was the Candy Man, he said I could come in and eat his car. I was weirded out but his car looked soooooo good so I ate his WHOLE car, when I was done eating his car I heard some weeping, it was coming from behind a tree . So I looked behind the tree it was the candy man again, I asked him "what's wrong" he said " you ate my WHOLE car (waaaa). 
I am soo soo sorry, I guess I got a bit carred away.
                                                                                                                                       

                                   That is the end of my story       100
                                                                   words

5 comments:

  1. i thought it was great but you could add a little more detail to your story
    but I think your story was amazing!!!

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  2. Hi Milana! I liked your story! All though I got some suggestions on how you could make your story 2x awesome! You could stay in the moment, and don't put more than one letter for so for example. I remember once I was at a fair with my family and I took my brother's candy, and of course my brother got angry. I got a question for you though, where did you get the Candy Man and his candy car idea from, also you would probably get a sugar rush from eating a whole car made out of candy! Overall your story was awesome!

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  3. I really liked how you used descriptive words to describe your story but it is a little hard to read when you are always changing colours. I thought your blog post was awesome! Keep up the good work!

    Alex

    ReplyDelete
  4. I really liked how you used descriptive words to describe your story but it is a little hard to read when you are always changing colours. I thought your blog post was awesome! Keep up the good work!

    Alex

    ReplyDelete